Sneaking Out 101
by Emylie Hartome
Summary: Just a little oneshot with Alice and Jasper. Jasper's like... OOC, but you dont hear him talk much so I'm not sure HOW OOC he is. Alice is wondering who cares about her death. And is terrible at sneaking out, so Jasper determines.


Hey-o. I'm Black Blasphemy, and this is, in fact, my first Twilight fanfic. Jasper's more talkative then he should be, and a little more lighthearted. I'm really, really, sorry about that. I was in way too good a mood when I wrote this... anyway, I hope you can tolerate it. And I don't want to hear it if you can't.

Disclaimer: Me no own Twilight any more then I own this cookie...

Onward!

--

"Alice!" Jasper was watching the vampire dance out of the Cullen home, past four in the morning. It looked like she didn't want to be caught.

"Jasper…" she groaned exasperatedly.

Jasper made his way quickly down the tree he perched on, until he was at his love's side.

"You're pathetic, you knew I was going to catch you." He rolled his eyes at Alice. She, of all people, knew that.

"I know," Alice sighed, and then grimaced. "but I took a different route then the vision showed."

"Whatever." Jasper looked at Alice, who was staring at the ground. "What're you going to do?" He leaned over, trying to look at Alice's face. Jasper put a hand on her shoulder, and calmed her after she convulsed.

"Nothing, anymore." Alice pouted, turning to go back inside.

"Come on, Alice. What's bothering you?" He knew better than anyone that she would be crying right now if she could.

"Nothing, Jasper."

Alice continued looking forlornly at the matted earth.

"If you won't tell me, I can always fetch Edward." Jasper grinned.

"You know very well he's with Bella right now."

Jasper sighed, almost giving up, and then putting on a thoughtful grin. "'Suppose I'll have to force it out of you, then, huh?"

Alice raised an eyebrow, in curiosity on what exactly he would do to make that happen. She found this out in a rather unpleasant manner, on her part.

Jasper scooped her off the ground into his scarred arms, and carried her off into the woods at a moderate speed – for him, anyway.

Alice decided not to squirm, considering what she wore. A black ruffled miniskirt, with three or four layers of lace underneath, and horizontally black and white striped knee socks to match the long-sleeved shirt she wore under a white panda tee. The shoes Alice wore would have stomped on the ground if worn by anyone but a vampire or werewolf, considering they were heavy four-inch heeled laced boots, covering most of her calf. The cat bell around her neck dinged with every few steps Jasper made.

From the way they were headed, they were going to the baseball clearing.

Sure enough, they came to the mid-forest haven of out of season flowers and bright grass, even in the dim moonlight. Jasper made a point to set Alice down carefully, like a porcelain doll. He grabbed her hand and nearly dragged the small girl to the middle of the clearing and sat her down.

"What is it?" Jasper asked her, flinging himself onto the soil, staring intently at the crescent that was the moon that night.

"Jasper, would you give it up? I don't want to tell you." Alice wrinkled her nose, and turned her face away from Jasper.

"Stop being so whiney, Alice." Carefully he rolled over and arched himself over Alice, pinning her in place.

"Jasper, get off."

"Tell me what's bugging you."

"No."

"You leave me with no choice."

He lifted his hand and placed it on her waist.

Alice half-snarled, but was cut off by sudden, swift alternating of Jasper's fingers on her waist. She began laughing. Her normally-calm face contorted in the effort to keep chortling, and although she didn't need to breathe, the muscle convulsion made her sides begin to hurt. She continuously tried to thrust Jasper off of her, and the attempts were unsuccessful until about five or ten minutes later, and he lay his head carefully on her shoulder, his lips gently brushing her neck as he spoke.

"Will you tell me now?" His breath, though cold, smelled faintly of peppermint and chocolate, and gave her the sensation that it was warming her skin -- although no such thing was happening.

Alice sighed dejectedly, and whispered, "I died today – technically."

"That I knew. Go on." Jasper almost sat up, but she flinched when he tried, so didn't.

"I was going to see… if anyone cared enough to go see my grave. That's all."

Jasper was silent for a moment, breathing, although he had no reason to. It seemed to comfort Alice.

"So, are you still going to go?" He asked in hushed tones, twirling Alice's hair subconsciously.

"When you get off of me, maybe." Alice smiled.

"You know, you're not very good at the whole, 'sneaking out' bit."

"No?"

Jasper let out a chuckle. "Not at all. Ed almost came down to get you, you know. Read you like a book."

"Didn't factor that one in." Alice smiled. "So, what, pray tell, did I do wrong?"

"Well, for one thing, even with your vampire grace, you managed to wake up Bella. Who alerted Edward, who read your mind, who told Esme, who told Carlisle, who told Rosalie, who told Emmett, who was watching T.V. with me."

"…our house is like a clique of high school girls."

Jasper let out a hearty laugh. "So it is," He ascended off of Alice. "Another thing," He straightened his face. "You didn't think about what to wear. I thought you didn't like that shirt?"

"…My shirt?" Alice's eyes flickered to the too-cutesy panda shirt Charlie had been kind enough to purchase for her the past Christmas. She snarled, and flung it off, leaving only the long-sleeved shirt on.

"Ha, see? We all knew something was up for you, fashion princess, to not pay attention to what you would wear."

"I get it, I get it. My house is like the damned high school, and there are dirty old men who stalk you everywhere."

Jasper held out his hand to her, and pulled her off the dewy grass.

"Shall we go?"

"Yeah. And you know what?"

"Hm?"

"I did something right tonight,"

"Oh, yeah? What?"

"I spent it with you, jerk." Alice nudged Jasper playfully, and leaned her head on his arm while they walked.

"Huh. And here I thought I was a dirty old stalker man."

"But you're my dirty old stalker man."

"I'm telling Edward you said that about him tomorrow, by the way."

"No –" Alice groaned.

Jasper laughed, then stopped. He quickly plucked a few daisies out of the earth and unraveled one of the ribbons in Alice's hair, and tying a bow around them.

He handed the bouquet to his girl.

"Just in case."

--

How'd you like it? Tolerable, in the least? I hope you don't hate me... w

R&R please.


End file.
